Tea Time with Tim — How to Find Mentors, Decrease Anxiety Through Training, and Much More (#363)

Welcome to a special episode called “Tea Time with Tim,” for which I solicited phone numbers and then called a handful of you to field any questions you might have.

Among other topics, we discuss:

  • How to go about finding a mentor.
  • The meaning of life.
  • How to extinguish anxiety.
  • Cocktails.
  • Relationship advice.
  • Training into confidence.

Without further ado, please enjoy this tea-fueled Q&A!

Listen to the episode on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, Overcast, Castbox, or on your favorite podcast platform.

#363: Tea Time with Tim — How to Find Mentors, Decrease Anxiety Through Training, and Much More


Want to hear another episode that had me calling up listeners and answering their questions? — Listen to this one, in which I tackled how to reassess existing projects, how to learn to care less about what other people think, how to ask better questions, and much more. (Stream below or right-click here to download):

#330: The Return of Drunk Dialing Q&A: How to Ask Better Questions, Take Better Risks, and More!


This podcast is brought to you by Peloton, which has become a staple of my daily routine. I picked up this bike after seeing the success of my friend Kevin Rose, and I’ve been enjoying it more than I ever imagined. Peloton is an indoor cycling bike that brings live studio classes right to your home. No worrying about fitting classes into your busy schedule or making it to a studio with a crazy commute.

New classes are added every day, and this includes options led by elite NYC instructors in your own living room. You can even live stream studio classes taught by the world’s best instructors, or find your favorite class on demand.

Peloton is offering listeners to this show a special offer. Visit onepeloton.com and enter the code TIM at checkout to receive $100 off accessories with your Peloton bike purchase. This is a great way to get in your workouts, or an incredible gift. Again, that’s onepeloton.com and enter the code TIM.

This podcast is also brought to you by WordPress, my go-to platform for 24/7-supported, zero downtime blogging, writing online, creating websites — everything! I love it to bits, and the lead developer, Matt Mullenweg, has appeared on this podcast many times.

Whether for personal use or business, you’re in good company with WordPress — used by The New Yorker, Jay Z, Beyoncé, FiveThirtyEight, TechCrunch, TED, CNN, and Time, just to name a few. A source at Google told me that WordPress offers “the best out-of-the-box SEO imaginable,” which is probably why it runs nearly 30% of the Internet. Go to WordPress.com/Tim to get 15% off your website today!

QUESTION(S) OF THE DAY: What was your favorite quote or lesson from this episode? Please let me know in the comments.

Scroll below for links and show notes…



  • The right and wrong questions to ask when you’re in search of a mentor. [06:26]
  • What’s my opinion on sending the often advised handwritten follow-up letter? [18:51]
  • I may not have the answer to the meaning of life, but here’s how I pursue purpose. [19:57]
  • What’s my method for staying calm and focused during potentially stressful times? [33:23]
  • Should you spend the time leading up to a physical evaluation (like a black belt test) training more rigorously, or resting? [52:29]
  • If I had to identify as a cocktail, what would it be and why? [55:19]
  • Why identifying a lack of purpose at some point in your life shouldn’t be seen as a character flaw, but an opportunity to reassess your options. Here’s how I proceed when this happens to me. [58:36]
  • Ways to identify, understand, and learn from what seem to be relationship incompatibilities. [1:12:13]
  • The basics of nonviolent communication for coping with sources of friction in a relationship. [1:28:59]